Chapter 6: House of Curses
“I can’t change his personality, but whenever he is behaving selfishly he will experience intense physical pain, and pretty soon the behavior will correct itself. Kind of like training a dog not to pee on the carpet,” said Cornelius.
“Like actually, you are supposed to use positive reinforcement to like encourage good behavior, instead of like punishment or whatever,” said Ashley.
“Yeah, I heard that too,” agreed Maggie, “punishment techniques will just confuse and frighten the animal. If you really want a well behaved dog you should patiently train them with treats.”
“Excuse me, but I’ve raised hell hounds for hundreds of years and the only thing they respond to is who has the biggest club to bash them over the head with, although it is cute how you two think you know something about the subject.” said Cornelius.
“Can we stop talking about me like I’m a goddamn dog?!” I said. A small shock coursed through my body. “Owe!” I said. Cornelius smiled and said, “You will note that the more unpleasant your behavior are the more it will hurt.”
“Who’s in charge of deciding that asshole? You?” I asked.
ZAP! A small lightning bolt of pain coursed through my body and I fell to my knees.
“Well actually it’s Chad who’s deciding. Normally I would use the wishes to punish the wisher, but in this case I will make an exception,” laughed Cornelius, “With that I bid you Adieu.” He bowed and disappeared in the blink of an eye.
“Come back you piece of shit demon!” I shouted, “FUCK! SHIT! FUCKING ASS!! OWE!!!! Goddamit!” Chad zapped me extra strong, and soon I was shaking on the floor. “Stop being so vulgar in the presence of a ladies,” said Chad and he smiled at Jenn. Jenn on the other hand didn’t reciprocate his affections and instead helped me up. “What’s your damage Chad? You didn’t have to hurt him so much,” said Jenn as she helped me sit on the couch. Chad sheathed with jealousy and sat down on the loveseat. “Like I’m totally going getting out of this place,” said Ashley, “Come on Meg lets like grab the keys and like splitsville.” “Ashley is speaking truth yo, I’ma grab my stuff,” agreed Zeke “I’ve got the keys right here.” said Megan. She reached for the front door but Dollie jumped out of the locket and stopped her. “NO,” she shouted, “the doorknob is cursed. Woo! Your hand will turn into a toad!” Megan pulled her hand away and stepped back from the door.
“Like whatever,” said Ashley, “We’ve used it plenty of times and like no one’s hand is a toad.”
“Yes, wooo, but you used it during the day, but the sun is down now, and some of the curses are only active during a certain time of the day,” explained Dollie.
“Dollie,” said Chad, “do you know what in the house is cursed and what’s not?”
“Yes, because I am also cursed I can see the cures give off a shimmer, but I was in the lake for about ten years so there may have been some new curses added to the house that I don’t know about. Joe should be able to see it too, because he is also cursed, woo,” said Dollie.
“Joe is cursed! Oh no!” exclaimed Jenn and wrapped her arms around me. I struggled to break free, but it was no use.
“Like what could he be cursed with good looks and popularity, as if,” said Ashley.
“Well actually that’s exactly what it is,” said Chad.
I broke free from Jenn and stood in the middle of the room. The objects seemed pretty normal to me, but then I looked at Dollie’s locket and noticed a faint shimmer. I looked around the room and suddenly saw lot of shimmering objects. The shimmer soon faded, but as soon as I looked at another object that I knew was cursed all the cursed objects began to shimmer again. I tried to control when I could see the shimmer and when I could not. It took a while but I was able to master it.
“What the fuck are you doing?” asked Chad, “You’ve been standing there motionless for ten minutes!”
“It is a fucking insane amount of cursed items in this room alone,” I said.
“Yup, I’ve been hanging around this place for a long time and seen a lot of good folk get in a heap of trouble just trying to get away,” said Dollie, “and as for us Joe, There ain't no getting away.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” I asked.
“Welp,” said Dollie, “see that there cursed bottle cap Chad is playing with.”
“This is CURSED!!” exclaimed Chad and threw the bottle cap away in disgust. The bottle cap flew around the room and hit Chad in the back of head before falling to the floor.
“... or those cursed earrings Ashley’s wearing?” continued Dollie, “Well, them and plenty more have tried to escape and been brought back every single time. Heck you even brought me back from the lake, woo.”
“Like ewe, I’m wearing cursed earrings!” exclaimed Ashley. She tried to take them out of her ears but the wouldn’t come out. “Like OMG, they’re not coming out!” screamed Ashley as she pulled on them. “They have a soul trapped inside them just like my locket, I’m sorry honey but those earrings ain’t coming off,” said Dollie.
“Well, are they like real gold?” asked Ashley.
“One hundred percent pure,” said Dollie.
“Will they like possess me or whatever?”
“Nope but they won’t come off until you die.”
“Then, I can just like get a second piercing or whatever, no big deal. But like more importantly you guys, I’m like totally cursed too! Joe we have like so much in common!” said Ashley. “In that case I want to be cursed like Joe!” said Jenn, “Which is the best cursed object?” “Well…” said Dollie, “the whole point of curses are they’re all powerful bad. Woo.” “Gold earrings and good looks don’t seem bad to me,” said Jenn as she searched the room for something to pick up.
“Yeah Jenn,” exclaimed Chad, “Don’t just randomly pick us something we barely got out of that backgammon game with our lives!”
“I don’t care Chad,” cried Jenn, “I’m going to be cursed and there is nothing you can do to stop me!”
“All this conversating made me mad hungry yo. I think I saw some apples in the kitchen. does anyone else want one?” asked Zeke.
“Zeke, we’re having a serious conversation here go get your apple and leave us alone,” snapped Chad.
Zeke walked into the kitchen half dejected, but his hunger for fruit inspired Jenn. “Look,” she exclaimed, “there’s a bowl of fake fruit on the table! Is that cursed?” “Yes, but you don’t want to touch it!” exclaimed Dolly. Jenn reached for the fruit, but Dolly got in her way. “Grab her Joe! WOOO!” I caught Jenn by the arms and held on tight. She flailed her legs and screamed, “Let me go! I want to stay here with you!” I held on tight, Chad came over and grabbed her flailing legs. He tried to help me calm her down, but Jenn was determined to get free. She got one leg lose and kicked the table with the plastic fruit on it. All the shit on the table went flying up into the air including the plastic fruit. “Don’t touch that fruit wooo!” yelled Dolly, but it was too late, the plastic apple was headed straight for Chad’s head. At that point everything thing seemed to run in slow motion. Chad dropped Jenn’s feet and covered his face with his arms like a bitch. The plastic apple was just about to hit him when Maggie reached out and snatched it out of the air with her bare hand.
“NO!” cried Dolly.
“I-I wasn’t thinking I just, my hand just… I-I had to s-save you Chad,” stammered Maggie.
“Maggie no! WHY!” cried Chad.
Maggie’s skin was starting to turn red. She fell to her knees and hugged her stomach. Jenn stopped fighting to get free and her knees gave out as Maggie’s skin darkened into a deep red.
“Do you want to know something Chad,” she said.
“What is it Maggie?” said Chad as squatted down to her eye level.
“Ever since we were kids, *cough*” Maggie coughed violently and fell to the ground. She curled up into the fetal position. It looked like her curled up body was melting into itself. Tears started streaming down Chad’s face as he scooped her up in her arms. The plastic apple rolled out of her hand and onto the floor. “Ever since we were kids,” she whispered. Chad stroked Maggie’s hair and looked her in the eyes. “Ever since we were..” strained Maggie. “I know,” said Chad, “I know.” Chad wrapped his arms around her. It was hard to see what happened next but Maggie’s body seemed to shrink rapidly and Chad sat hunched over in silence.
“Chad, like what happened!” screamed Ashley, “where’s Maggie?”
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